Classic Quotes From Original Dallas

[midwestdj]

Can't find the thread that we had talking about the quotes from the original run, so if it's still here... hopefully, Shelly will "merge" for me...

I have the great fortune of having purchased the whole series and just laughed so hard I almost pee'd my self!

The Dove Hunt episode... Sue Ellen to JR "I'm touched by your sudden concern for children. Now, I just wish you had adopted me instead of married me".

[dr.ivankipling]

Original Dallas was a gold mine when it comes to quotes lol. A few of my favorites:
Jock to Bobby:"Real power is something you take!"
Sue Ellen to J.R.:"How agreeable.Wonder why you're so agreeable J.R.?Did you find someone new to sleep with you today or did you have to rely on one of your old mistresses?"
Sue Ellen to J.R." I'm gonna drink myself into oblivion!"
Sue Ellen to Mandy as they meet at a restaurant:"Well, the Winger tramp. Don't tell me that J.R. let you out of bed long enough to have lunch?"
Miss Ellie to J.R.&Jock after she hears Jock telling J.R. a women's place is in the bedroom not the boardroom. "Very nice Jock.....I know what you meant.You believe the woman's place is two steps behind the man,except when walking through a mine field.......Well you&J.R should know all about spoilers Jock.....Everything you touch you spoil.Relationships,people's lives" J.R.interrupts with "Well Mama I think you're exaggerating a little bit" Miss Ellie responds with "Am I? J.R. you&your daddy use people up&then throw them away.Even members of your own family." (Miss Ellie then glances at both Jock&J.R. and turns to leave the room. As she reaches the door she turns round&glances at her husband&son once more&says softly)"You both SICKEN me!"
Oh how I love original Dallas!!

[victor lord jr]

i loved when callie came to southfork and bobby and suellen would refer to her as the chid bride.and when she went to the oil ball and callie said to suellen you dont look like a lush,and then suellen went up to jr a decked him.and when suellen shot jr and suellen found out he was still alive that bastard lived.

[July Baby]

J.R.: "There's very little that goes on in Dallas that I don't know about." (Every time someone asked him "How did you know?")

When OLM head Walt Driscoll and his wife were having J.R. and Sue Ellen over for dinner, J.R. (over the phone) said: "Now Walt, I don't want you to go to any trouble." Then, after he hung up the phone, "Cause I'm bringing the trouble with me!" (said with his vintage grin and laugh, planning to blackmail Driscoll into giving him a variance to drill).

[midwestdj]

Original Dallas was a gold mine when it comes to quotes lol. A few of my favorites:
Jock to Bobby:"Real power is something you take!"
Sue Ellen to J.R.:"How agreeable.Wonder why you're so agreeable J.R.?Did you find someone new to sleep with you today or did you have to rely on one of your old mistresses?"
Sue Ellen to J.R." I'm gonna drink myself into oblivion!"
Sue Ellen to Mandy as they meet at a restaurant:"Well, the Winger tramp. Don't tell me that J.R. let you out of bed long enough to have lunch?"
Miss Ellie to J.R.&Jock after she hears Jock telling J.R. a women's place is in the bedroom not the boardroom. "Very nice Jock.....I know what you meant.You believe the woman's place is two steps behind the man,except when walking through a mine field.......Well you&J.R should know all about spoilers Jock.....Everything you touch you spoil.Relationships,people's lives" J.R.interrupts with "Well Mama I think you're exaggerating a little bit" Miss Ellie responds with "Am I? J.R. you&your daddy use people up&then throw them away.Even members of your own family." (Miss Ellie then glances at both Jock&J.R. and turns to leave the room. As she reaches the door she turns round&glances at her husband&son once more&says softly)"You both SICKEN me!"
Oh how I love original Dallas!!

Do you remember when Sue Ellen made the "oblivion" comment, was it her first bout with alcohol or later in the series?

[dr.ivankipling]

It was later in the series.It was after/around the time Sue Ellen had made a discovery about Holly Harwood.

[July Baby]

J.R. (complaining about the inclusion/intrusion of Clayton and Ray: We used to have all Ewings sitting around the dinner table. Now we have Farlows and Krebbses.

[victor lord jr]

J.R. (complaining about the inclusion/intrusion of Clayton and Ray: We used to have all Ewings sitting around the dinner table. Now we have Farlows and Krebbses.

hah I loved it when jr would refer to ray as a half breed.i loved it when val came back for lucy and they set a trap for jr,and when lucy wanted to be a singer,and my all time fav when lucy yelled at ray,jr will kill you[ im still not sure why she said that.]i cant image jr beating ray up.

[midwestdj]

In season 5 JR meets with a man from the IRS and his first name is Nelson and JR calls him Major Nelson. LOL

[victor lord jr]

when clayton and jr was fighting and the pi asked jr about claytons heart attack and jr says yaya he lives he lives he dies he dies he should have never married my momma,and when suellen was in the sanitaruim and she told bobby,i married the wrong brother,and bobby beating the crap out ot cliff for using suellen

[sharon49]

About the last scene of Jock and miss Ellie, they were discusssing how Donna and Miss Ellie would put a stop to the project of Tapakpa, a land process to build up as a business site and Jock had never paid that much attention to Miss Ellie and her DOTA work. Miss Ellie almost had an affair with an old man. Jock yells out to miss Ellie, Hell Ellie, I am Tapakpa !

[midwestdj]

It was later in the series.It was after/around the time Sue Ellen had made a discovery about Holly Harwood.

Watching that episode now, its season 6's cliffhanger. Linda Gray looked like she was having so much fun delivering that line! WooHoo!

[dr.ivankipling]

I remember quite a few things from original Dallas but I most likely wouldn't be able to pinpoint events/scenes to a specfic season if my life depended on it.
That scene was fantastic!

[midwestdj]

I remember quite a few things from original Dallas but I most likely wouldn't be able to pinpoint events/scenes to a specfic season if my life depended on it.
That scene was fantastic!

Trust me the only reason I can right now is because I'm watching the series on DVD, if not for that.... I wouldn't know who Bobby Ewing was! LOL

[dr.ivankipling]

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^LOL Midwest!

[midwestdj]

JR "I don't know how a grown man can be as dumb as Cliff Barnes. I don't know how he manages to feed himself."

Gotta admit, that's a good one. Along side of "Barnes, you just keep getting dumber and dumber everyday!".

The writers and Larry Hagman sure did come up with some great one liners.

[victor lord jr]

JR "I don't know how a grown man can be as dumb as Cliff Barnes. I don't know how he manages to feed himself."

Gotta admit, that's a good one. Along side of "Barnes, you just keep getting dumber and dumber everyday!".

The writers and Larry Hagman sure did come up with some great one liners.

when did he say that,about feeding himself,i wanted watch that?I loved when they got in the fight at the ball and jr told suellen that barnes bit me,im going to have to get a rabies shot now.

[midwestdj]

when did he say that,about feeding himself,i wanted watch that?I loved when they got in the fight at the ball and jr told suellen that barnes bit me,im going to have to get a rabies shot now.

It's season 7 somewhere in the middle of the year. I can't remember exactly which episode it was, however, JR was listening to a tape recording of a bug he had planted at Cliff's office. Hope this helps.

That Oil Barron's Ball was season 7 as well! Too funny!

[sharon49]

I can think of so many, but one that stands out with me is :
When JR had set up the deal with the off shore rigs and there was a revolution going to take place very soon. JR got a bunch of his old buddies that had cut his throat in past deals. One was that Vaun Leland I think and he had turned down a loan that Jock needed to save Southfork a few weeks earlier. When all hell broke lose, Leland said to Jock, Jock, You got to help me! And Jock sat rather quietly in front of JR and said, seems I remember once a man asked for just a few weeks to come up with the money on a note and you said --- No Jock, A DEAL is a DEAL , - Payment now! And that's how I feel now - (Jock) it still the same: A DEAL is a DEAL ! Too bad for you. It may have been Seth Stone because I think he did kill himslef over it !! Thus Mary Lue Stone took over his part in the oil cartell. My son and I often say that and laugh as we remember those good shows.

[EW1NG_1]

when did he say that,about feeding himself,i wanted watch that?I loved when they got in the fight at the ball and jr told suellen that barnes bit me,im going to have to get a rabies shot now.

J.R.: "He bit me!"
Sue Ellen: "Who?"
J.R.: "Cliff Barnes, that rodent!"
Sue Ellen: "How did he bite you?"
J.R.: ''With his teeth, Sue Ellen, how the hell do you think he bit me?! That little weasel, I'm gonna have to go out and get a rabies shot''
"Where the hell is that first aid kit!"

---

"You couldn't find any oil under the hood of my car if I gave you a golden stick to do it!" (Jr to Digger)

"You take another shot at my daddy, and I'm gonna knock of that nose of yours 5 inches of the center!" (Jr to Digger)



J.R.: The proper recipient of a Digger Barnes scholarship award isn't a university, it's the neighborhood bar.
CLIFF: You shut the hell up!
J.R.: And that's how you ought to honor that drunken bum of a daddy of yours.

PUNCH UP @ THE Oil Barons ball just after cliff gets oil man of the year and he gets of stage after making a speech about his daddy! lol
Jr just couldnt help it!

"Ray never was comfortable eating with the family; we do use knives and forks''

Jr lol!

[victor lord jr]

J.R.: "He bit me!"
Sue Ellen: "Who?"
J.R.: "Cliff Barnes, that rodent!"
Sue Ellen: "How did he bite you?"
J.R.: ''With his teeth, Sue Ellen, how the hell do you think he bit me?! That little weasel, I'm gonna have to go out and get a rabies shot''
"Where the hell is that first aid kit!"

I remember that to funny,you have to love the stuff jr says.

[midwestdj]

i loved when callie came to southfork and bobby and suellen would refer to her as the chid bride.and when she went to the oil ball and callie said to suellen you dont look like a lush,and then suellen went up to jr a decked him.and when suellen shot jr and suellen found out he was still alive that bastard lived.

I just watched all these scenes within the last week! Funny stuff. I bet Linda Gray had a ball decking Hagman! LOL

[EW1NG_1]

I remember that to funny,you have to love the stuff jr says.

absolutely he has the best lines in the show!

another classic quote/scene from Pam and JR now

J.R.: Sue Ellen and I went to the Oil Baron's Club last night and who did we run into but that termite brother of yours.
PAM: I assume you're speaking to me?
J.R.: Uh, anybody else got a termite for a brother around here?
PAM: Just Bobby

[DrCampbell]

JR To Clayton:

"In love with my wife! Courtin' my momma!"

He was 100 percent right too. I think it was the most sympathetic he's ever been portrayed in the series.

Runners-up:

"If you won't fight for your own money, you sure as hell won't fight for mine!" (after faking out a goon by pretending to not pay him)

"That was brilliant, Sue Ellen!" (after she revealed she had made Mandy into a lingerie model).

"Make sure you stop at the drugstore along the way" (to some guy he sent to seduce Marilee Stone)

"Now you type yourself up a nice letter of recommendation, and I'll sign it." (to a secretary he fired)

[midwestdj]

I am watching the episode where JR says "Oh Barnes, you just get dumber and dumber every day" and then giggles! I LOVE that scene! Hagman played that scene like a little kid holding a big secret!

Love it.

[victor lord jr]

I am watching the episode where JR says "Oh Barnes, you just get dumber and dumber every day" and then giggles! I LOVE that scene! Hagman played that scene like a little kid holding a big secret!

Love it.

oh yeah that was funny,jr really did love cliff.lol
my favs were
1.bobby telling jr,you have a unholy nak of making your best friends,your worst enemies.
2.suellen telling jr she wanted a baby and he said i'll get you a puppy.
3.suellen telling bobby,I get used by all the men in my life,he finds out about her and cliff.
4.when jr said those magic words,i'll destroy ewing oil,before letting you get.

[midwestdj]

when did he say that,about feeding himself,i wanted watch that?I loved when they got in the fight at the ball and jr told suellen that barnes bit me,im going to have to get a rabies shot now.

victor... I have no idea how I remembered that you wanted to know what episode the quote about Cliff feeding himself came from, however - I did!, I am re-watching the series again and I came across the episode. It's from season 7 and is called "When The Bough Breaks". Hope you get to see it, it's a great line!

[victor lord jr]

victor... I have no idea how I remembered that you wanted to know what episode the quote about Cliff feeding himself came from, however - I did!, I am re-watching the series again and I came across the episode. It's from season 7 and is called "When The Bough Breaks". Hope you get to see it, it's a great line!

thanks after I get done posting i'll go watch it ,thanks again

[midwestdj]

thanks after I get done posting i'll go watch it ,thanks again

Not a problem, I'm just impressed with myself that I remembered that you had asked... In September! LOL, My memory must not be as bad as I thought it was!